First Campaigner Challenge 2012 – Flash Fiction “Mind’s Eye”

I am so excited! I’ve never participated in this type of writers’ campaign challenge before AND I’ve never written flash fiction. What a newbie I am!  Woohoo!  Bring it on!

I’m participating in the 4th Writers’ Building Campaign with Rachael Harrie.

Here’s the writing challenge and I chose to accept it with a vengeance:

Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “Shadows crept across the wall”. These five words will be included in the word count.

If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), do one or more of these:

  • end the story with the words: “everything faded.” (also included in the word count)
  • include the word “orange” in the story
  • write in the same genre you normally write
  • make your story 200 words exactly!

* * *

Mind’s Eye

Shadows crept across the wall. There was no mistaking it this time; he followed me from my nightmares into the daytime.  First, it was only my erratic imagination filled with bizarre shades of orange and tinges of red.

There were days he stalked my peripheral vision, but now he appeared all of the time.  No one else gave any indication or noticed him lurking in the shadows.

The dark, hypnotic movement of his fingers, elongated and branchlike attached to thick arms and a stocky upper body came into view across walls, sides of buildings, and etched in between trees in the park.  It was always the same, he beckoned me into his realm.  It was a paranormal world filled with chaos and mayhem.

I fought to resist his temptations.   I saw glimpses of his handiwork and reprimanded myself for even contemplating it.  I hurried away.  It didn’t matter how fast I ran, he was always there.

I stood on the high cliff, wind blasting my face and waves crashing below.  It was mesmerizing because of the powerful and swift movement of nature.  I took another step to the edge, daring not to look behind me.  A rock crumbled.  Everything faded…

* * *

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About jchasenovelist

Published thriller author, criminologist, and blogger.
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29 Responses to First Campaigner Challenge 2012 – Flash Fiction “Mind’s Eye”

  1. Flash fiction really gets you to the core of what you want to represent. Nicely done.

    Tale Spinning: Wednesday’s Child


  2. J.C. Martin says:

    What a powerful ending! Great work!


  3. Wow! You did a great job!


  4. Whoa that was intense! I wonder if the guy following her was really real or just imaginary… Great job 🙂

    I’m entry #19


  5. Nicely done. I like it!


  6. Ann Cory says:

    Excellent job! You had my attention the entire time. Great pacing, suspense, and tone. 🙂


  7. Woah! What a powerful ending! Nice job! 🙂

    I’m #37


  8. Ooh, very creepy indeed! Those dark, hypnotic fingers… And the fact that he came from her nightmares…


  9. Great intensity! Powerful ending! 🙂


  10. siv says:

    Love your descriptions here, very well done!


  11. Nick Wilford says:

    Powerful and intriguing. Love the third paragraph, “his fingers elongated and branchlike”… what great imagery, I can really see it. Well done! Looks like you found a new skill! 🙂


  12. Dun, dun, dunnn! Nice work! 🙂


  13. Ashley Nixon says:

    I got so lost in trying to escape with her. That’s a scary situation! Very well done!


  14. siv says:

    Congratulations! Your piece has been shortlisted to advance to the quarter final round. Good luck!


  15. This is a great piece. Congratulations on moving forward.


  16. Ooo, that sent chills down my spine. Very well done! 🙂


  17. Loved the cliff-crumbling ending!

    Laurie Buchanan, entry #92


  18. Alexia says:

    Oooh, I’m intrigued. I like this a lot. Well done.


  19. Very Ann Rice. Nice job. Mine is #71


  20. Christy Farmer says:

    You did a great job with this and I agree with the strong ending! Well done! I’m # 61.


  21. Temptation wins! I loved the dark imagery, perfect ending. 🙂


  22. Gilliad Stern says:

    Great story! Awesome job from a fellow campaigner.


  23. Tizzy Potts says:

    Great piece with a lot of suspense. It made me imagine someone being followed by the Grim Reaper, or even that the man in the shadows represented some kind of depressive thoughts which led her to be standing on the clifftop. Nicely done.


  24. Jocelyn Rish says:

    This one had a cool Twilight Zone feel to it.


  25. Scott Bury says:

    This is some of your best writing to date, Jennifer.


  26. C.M. Brown says:

    Well done! Intriguing story!


  27. Well done! I’ve plunged into the depth of this enigmatic literary piece! Everything is very expressive.


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